Immersion
Immersion: Deep mental involvement in something
Immersion is feeling and state that is amazing. It’s the feeling of being really involved deeply so that time stays still. It’s being surrounded by and engulfed in whatever one is immersed. The creative ideas flow. To be immersed in a passion is so satisfying...
Somehow I have a certain feeling of discomfort surrounding immersing myself. Even in things that I love to do. There is a certain hesitation. It shows itself in procrastination and a feeling of being overwhelmed. There is also a perceived feeling of losing myself. A lack of control?
It’s not the immersion itself that scares me. I love that state. I have an aversion to where I will be at the end of it. I wonder if it relates to the disappointment/void that comes when things reach a conclusion. Being a dancer over so many years and use to the highs of performing, there is always the come down/ void that is left at the end after it is completed. I am no different to others in trying avoid negative emotions and perhaps an aversion to immersion is a coping strategy. Don’t go in too deep if I don’t have to and the void will be less…
This is a weakness. In a structure where one is committed to a person, group or piece there is enough engagement that it’s not really an issue. When one is working for and solely reliant on oneself, it’s much more of a challenge. It limits me personally in what I can reach and create. It also limits my enjoyment as immersion in a task brings such joy.
So it is time to let go and get lost. Enjoy the chaos and not knowing where I will end up. Accept that I cannot control everything and feel. Have a goal, keep my focus, but let it happen.
Here are some suggestions (to myself!) to get started:
to define the goals
the next bight-size steps to take
find a space alone where no one will disturb me
clear all other distractions (eg. phone off!)
set an initial time limit of for instance 10 mins
do all this at a specific time and even a routine time (a date with myself!)
Lower the expectations and enjoy the moment, let go and immerse! Believe that I will still be there at the end, greater for the experience!